Transit Lab: Jupiter Gigantifies My Mind [Five Hundred Exclamation Points]
I have to add more about this Jupiter transit - it’s stationing on my Mercury in Sag, after all. I kind of can’t help it. My Jupiter’s natally in my 3rd, so this is kind of to be expected - I’m fully at home with the energy of communication getting injected with what feels like a cocktail of nine kinds of uppers.
I’m simultaneously having a desire to reach out and communicate with a bunch of people (everyone on earth), talk to my roommate nonstop, write on a dozen articles, and at the same time I feel remarkably calm and mentally with it. If none of those things happen, great. My mind feels huge right now, and it’s entirely a rad feeling. What I’m making sure to do is note all the ideas that crossing my mind whevever they do. This looks like writing random sentences and titles in my journal. And I know I can come back to them later and know exactly what they’re about.
New experiences in the psychic realm I’ve written about here are related, as are my ability to listen to others right now and hear their perspectives in a new way. Jupiter in this light is totally the benefactor! Okay, I’m a little hyper. But this energy’s about exaggeration, right?! Maybe I don’t use enough exclamation points for Jupiter’s taste!!! Let’s rectify that right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
July 31, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Transit Lab: Mercury Conjunct South Node, Full Moon in the 4th house
If you know me and my Mars-Uranus square the nodes in the 1st, you’ll know that I abhor violence, overaggressiveness, yelling and all related things. To reflect the karmic things this configuration represents, I’ve drawn much conflict to me to teach me appropriate uses of aggression and self-defense, and I haven’t always responded with more that utter fear. You’ll forgive a little past-life PTSD, I’m sure.
As I write, my neighbor is yelling at the person whom she regularly calls to yell at, and I am calm.
Ridiculously calm.
Unbelievably so.
But I mean c-a-l-m.
Whatever could have happened? A healer called me this afternoon to ask if I might want to trade bodywork for an astrology session. In the first few seconds my intuition said “Yes!” and he after a few minutes asked me if I have had any trauma in this life. I said I’d had a few vehicular accidents of various kinds, and that I’d hit my head pretty hard a few years ago in a bad fall. But I realized that it was a great opportunity to talk about the feelings surrounding the old karmic grudge I released the other day.
As a sample, he walked me into the work he does. I think I’d asked just how he gets where he goes with it. It was probably more than a half hour of putting me back in the scenario while having me feel what I felt, and then switch to the position of the person hurting me and speak a sentence reflecting the energy he was showing me - that I took on and carry with me now. I was a little confounded at first, and then got into it. For your reference, it was a torture scenario at the end of which I died - you know, standard stuff.
When I thought it was over, he had me come back to the present and asked me how I felt. I said there was a ball of energy in my throat, so we went back in and found the place in the story when I first felt that. And after feeling the feelings that me had and speaking sentences refective of the other person’s energy, he had me come back to the present. He asked me again how I felt and I said tired, so we went back in and found out where in the story I felt tired. And so on.
[She is totally reaming this guy out. I think he's the father of her child, and has a lot of trouble working with him re custody. She also called his mom between bouts with him, which seems to have made him super mad. And I'm not sure she could be madder, to tell you the truth.]
After those few re-entrances into the story, when he asked me how I felt, I felt awesome. I had some doubt that I had actually just released some of that, but the proof is in my total calmness for the last fifteen minutes as my neighbor screamed her head off out her back door, next to mine. Even a few weeks ago that made me so unhappy, so nervous, and it made me want to run away. To be fair, not as bad as the yahoos setting off fireworks in the street in front of my house, which I worked through on July 4th.
So, Mercury transits the South Node of the Moon: You may get a chance to release emotional detritus from the past by admitting it into your consciousness and talking through it. And the full moon in Aquarius in y 4th house - at the exact time of the full moon I was releasing old emotional trauma, fitting perfectly with the symbolism of Aquarius/4th house.
July 29, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Transit Lab: Mercury on South Node, Moon on North Node
And also that amazing Uranus squaring Saturn…
It’s more stuff about horses, surprise: The friend I rode with had a painting in her bedroom of two horses, commissioned by her dad to represent her parents’ relationship. This huge painting was in effect lording over her bed, and she said at times she’s had bad dreams about it. Basically, it wasn’t working out to have it there anymore.
I helped her wrap it and move it to another room, and then clear the space for her to inhabit the space in ways that work for her. We burned rubbing alcohol with epsom salts all around the apartment, and set the intention for what energy doesn’t need to be there to go away. As I was telling her about the importance of the objects we have and their effect on us, I was guided to a couple of places that had stuff that seemed like they needed to go. First a particular book on a shelf, given to her by someone she was involved with a few years ago and lived with. It wasn’t the book, but the hand-written card tucked inside from when he gave it to her that was drawing me. Old energy had to go! Another thing were two particular books that were on the table next to her bed, perhaps two vibes that might not fit well with restful sleeping.
She’s in a huge transition in her life, committing to take better care of herself and really bring herself and her gifts out. It involves changing her habits, patterns, the people she spends time with, what she spends her time doing, and basically everything about her life. This is fully inspiring to me, and our time together is a gift. The transit lab part of this is that with Mercury on the South Node, there’s information from the karmic past or people I knew in the past that I would expect to come to me. It’s been in the form of this friend, who can see through some of my distracting behavior into the real heart of who I know I am, as I can see her. Each of us is offering very positive reflections of the other’s potentials.
Also regarding the past, I released a frankly gigantic karmic grudge I learned I had against someone I know. Mercury on the SN tells you what’s going on, and the Moon on the NN in opposition indicates a tension, which is the challenge to choose compassion and let go the meaning the information you’ve gotten seems to have, if you can choose the Moon’s heart energy over Mercury’s head energy (and all of us should be encouraged to stretch into our North Nodes, since it’s what we haven’t done as much of in the karmic past and can really use learning now). The invitation is to open your heart in a way that you might not be likely to do because of your habits and assumptions. In my case, accepting the reality of my feelings right now (North Node in Capricorn/4th house) was a better option than clinging to what I used to feel and the memory of it and what it means about me (South Node in Cancer/10th house).
When you have transits to the South Node, you can expect something from the past, often the karmic past, to visit you and show you something about yourself, your patterns and habits. It could also be skills and understandings from other times that you suddenly have access to. For me, the psychic ability to pick out apparently from thin air the stuff in my friend’s apartment that are energetically crowding her space is one.
Most of us are not conscious of a multi-level reality in which this life echoes and repeats our past lives, but I see this happen to me and others just about every day. The lives we’re living now recreate the themes from our pasts - we’re redoing things so that we can learn more about the experiences.
When Venus was there (in Cancer in my 10th house) a few months ago, a man approached me after a meeting I went to and asked me if I believed in past lives. I said I did, and he asked me a few questions about time and place. He told me he saw me in the 19th century in a blue Civil War uniform, and he proceeded to tell me a bunch of stuff that seemed totally irrelevant to anything for anyone at any time, all the while looking me straight in the eye. I excused myself a few minutes later, after running a background script in my mind recognizing that he was recognizing me from a past life - Venus indicates relationships and people, and coming to the South Node there’s a likelihood that you’ll meet someone from your past. I don’t know what he was accomplishing, but apparently simply letting me know he knew me was important for him. As a contrast, a couple of years ago when Venus was on my North Node in Capricorn in the 4th house, a friend gave me a copy of an accounting program, as I was beginning the self-employed thing.
By Tom Jacobs
Transit Lab: Uranus Square Saturn (The Passive-aggressive Horse)
Recently a couple of new friends came into my life, and one in particular seems to be bringing me numerous opportunities to work out the energy of transiting Uranus square my natal Saturn. The first thing was an invitation to a service at a local spiritual center. Get this: I chose to go to what amounts to a church! And I wasn’t even being paid! (I used to work as a musician in churches.) She’s offering ideas for new experiences and chances for new input that’s really helpful right now.
Today, we went horseback riding. For an activity a few days ago, I suggested hiking or tennis, and she came back with horseback riding. It’s something I hadn’t thought of since I was 12 and it sounded reeaallllly rad so I agreed.
When it was time to mount up, I was told I would ride Noah, the biggest horse there. I thought it was this huge brown guy in front of us, who looked terrifyingly large, but that was the guide’s horse. Noah, in fact, is the second biggest horse in the country, or was it world - no joke. Apparently Clydesdales can run kind of big, and he’s a huge one. If you’re in a human suit right now, don’t you tend to think of horses as large anyway? Think of a big horse and then inflate it to the point that you’re nervous that your eyes are seeing correctly - he’s that big.
I looked at this giant that I was supposed to somehow get into a sitting position on, and in a moment a stepstool appeared with a guide. I climbed up, and the stirrups and saddle were adjusted. I was a little hesitant (but not nearly as much as when we trotted on the ride), but things were shaping up well.
During the actual ride, Noah engaged in a range of behaviors I was told were tests to see how much he could get away with. At first he got away with all of them, but after I guided him to stay in line, stay a horse-length behind the one in front, and wouldn’t let him stop to chew on branches here and there, he got that I wouldn’t any longer let him do whatever he felt like. So he started drifting over to the side of the trail whenever there was a big tree that he could drag me up against. No kidding, this horse is passive-aggressive. So that’s why he likes being the last in line, as the guide mentioned. After he’d started that crap, I told him lovingly (and soft enough that the other people there couldn’t hear) that he couldn’t intimidate me, and that he could drag me up against all the trees he could; I wasn’t going to give up the reins.
One thing I’ve experienced with Uranus transits over the past two years is an inconsistent influx of information about my conditioning from past lives. First with it squaring my Moon, then with the transiting South Node of the Moon conjuncting my natal Uranus, and now with it squaring my natal Saturn, which opposes that Moon. It happens in different ways. A few times in the form of people coming up to me here or there and tell me things about me in past lives, or asking pointed questions about past-life stuff that, were you asked them, you’d think you entered some kind of joke-on-you hidden camera show in which people are armed with too much info about you for comfort. Also in the form of suddenly-available emotional memories that leave me balling, etc. - people in public love this one.
Also it’s been in the form of people I most definitely know from other incarnations. My new friend, for example, whose casual comments to me teach me so much about me in this moment & life that I know she knows me from another. And it comes in the form of new views on experiences that awaken a quality of memory in me. Being on that horse this morning is in that last category.
I felt on top of the world, and aware of a sense of pride and purpose. I don’t know how to explain it better, but reconnecting to a horse is a very good thing for me in my present process of deconditioning current and past-life beliefs. When we were done riding, as my friend and I stood next to the horses, we saw just how big Noah is. My friend gave me I think two high fives for actually riding such a monstrously large horse. And I didn’t think about it like that until we went for lunch afterwards, after picking up her book on animal totems, Animal Speak, by Ted Andrews.
The basic idea on the horse entry is that when a horse comes into your life (as a totem, but I’m not yet sure that’s what happened - I just, um, rode a really gigantic horse), “it may be time to examine aspects of travel and freedom in your life” (p.282). So, here I am, opening up to what Uranus squaring my natal retrograde Saturn in Gemini in the 9th has to say.
When I write joke horoscopes based on natal charts, the intersection of Pisces and the 6th house (including Neptune in Virgo or the 6th, and Mercury in Pisces or the 12th, etc.), I usually include a prediction that person will become or be swept off his feet by a large-animal veterinarian. Instead of that, I just met a phenomenally large horse and let him teach me something about freedom, a new kind or one that I’d forgotten.
I’m considering some travel opps that fit the Uranus/Pisces/6th symbolism as I understand it, opening to lose the idea that I’m not traveling much for a few years (the understanding I’ve had about my feeling of mobility the last few years - it’s seemed more important to do inner work and be more still than to travel). But it looks like exactly what’s needed is to travel, even if to do quiet inner work.
Okay, then, I’m open to what drifts my way, even if it involves more bone-chillingly large animals that I’m expected to ride and guide. And the overall message will probably have to do with the challenge to actually ride it - and being sure I’m not going to give up the reins.
July 27, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Evil, Astrologically: Lucifer
I have what might be a tome about evil gestating in my innards. For a few years I’ve been working with the asteroid Lucifer (1930), making notes, numerous false starts on that tome and working extensively with clients on the archetype as it plays out in their lives. It’s just not time for the big statement to come out. But today, I’m inspired to share a tiny bit of one corner of it.
The only useful definition of evil is that which we can use to move away from what we think of as good. Each of us has an internal goodmeter that’s a part of our makeup as conscious beings; it’s the part of us that is the God nature. Whether yours is informed by someone else’s moral system (religion) or your own inner compass, you have one and you use it constantly to one end or the other. When you behave in line with what you understand is good, you feel good about yourself and life. When you behave out of line with that, for any reason, you feel bad about yourself and life. It’s that simple. There’s a soul sickness we engender as we go against what we know is good, what we know is the vibration of God.
As soon as I began putting it in charts and mentioning here and there that I use this asteroid and work with the notion of evil, I drew people who needed deeply to learn to understand this part of themselves. Many times it appears in my clients’ nodal configurations, indicating that there are karmic issues with doing or the perception of doing, or the fear of having done, or the fear of being, evil.
The Lucifer archetype is the part of us that makes the decision about which way we’re headed, toward the good or away from it. The heart of what I want to share in this post is that each of us has this part of ourselves, and each of us is always choosing which direction we’re headed. It is very important to learn to understand this part of ourselves, and why we allow it to do what it does (if it ever gets to run the show), and it is very important to understand that the things that we do are, simply, the things that we do. They’re part of the journey of experiencing what it is to be a human.
I encourage people who have suspicions or memories (or reports from psychics, etc.) that they have done evil in the karmic past and in this life to understand the archetype of Lucifer as it plays out in their psyches, hearts and lives. We’re talking at root here about the choice to recognize and be aligned with something greater/bigger than ourselves, or refuse to do so and invest everything in our own egos. The human experience is defined on a key level by navigating the terrain of relationship with ego, and I note that all existential questions are Lucifer questions. So, when people come into the counseling room with a sense of having done wrong, I help them understand what the energy is about, help them sort out the past from the present, and work to give a solid ground to their understanding of their options.
This post was triggered by an e-mail conversation with a colleague having Lucifer square the nodal axis, indicating a misuse or perception of misuse of ego energy in the karmic past to evil ends, ends that achieved what was understood at the soul level to be not good. His response in this life is to make sure that he speaks what is true. There’s more to it than that, but I want to share that even with the knowledge or memory of having done wrong, which, frankly, we all have, the healthy response now is learn what is our choice and choose what is best right now. Allowing ourselves to restrict living in the here and now because of memories of having done wrong (and so being defined as bad, or evil), is a self hate that does no one any good. This healing work is about recognizing how the energy of evil, the move away from good, can be turned around with understanding and some heart-opening, forgiveness work to become the energy of the light bearer (Lucifer is Latin for light bearer), the servant of good/God - the healing opportunity offered by Lucifer work is the healing of the relationship with God.
My efforts to get this teaching together in a cohesive fashion have been stalled due to my own lab time in the lessons of Lucifer. Or, better put, they’re slow in coming as I live my own Lucifer story and learn about my own choices. As I wrote to that colleague, I’m usually quiet about the fact that this asteroid is conjunct my natal Sun. Pretty much no one who fears he or she might have done wrong in the past will tell you, but here we are. I know my present choices are in line with what I know is good - I’m determined never to forget what the power of choice can create - and so I’m okay with telling you here. Part of my hesitation, incidentally, is due to the myopic understanding and terror in some parts of our culture regarding the name Lucifer. But as you’ll see if you stay tuned to my work, the real Lucifer inside each and every one of us has nothing to do with Judeo-Christian notions of the devil. That, my friends, is a red herring to keep you from integrating this powerful part of yourself and living with your own understanding of serving good as your compass.
In the mean time, I’m working with clients who are open to understanding themselves fully, and I recognize that their openness to this archetype inside them is part of my lab experience in the Lucifer course: The more they accept their Luciferian natures, the more I can accept mine. Who knew that becoming an astrologer would be my path to heal karma?
If you’d like to keep an ear to the ground for more of my work with Lucifer, sign up for my mailing list at http://www.tdjacobs.com.
July 26, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Astrology Readings for Babies
I love doing charts of babies for parents. The other day I did one, a gift from a friend of theirs who found me and decided to give the evolutionary thing a try.
What I love about those readings is the chance to give parents a heads-up on where their kid is coming from. Certainly it’s important for parents to pay attention to their newborn and get to know him or her, but understanding the sort of stuff he or she is coming into this life with, whether you believe in past lives or not, can be an amazing addition to the parenting toolbox.
The value goes beyond recognizing aptitude for creative work or science or anything else, which is what some might expect is the use of having a baby’s chart read. In fact, all kids are creative - all people are creative. It’s part of the deal about being human. And with an aptitude for science, the way the mind works, what that mind will be interested in, and what other life factors will significantly influence the mind in a way answer this question, but I suppose the definition of “aptitude” you’re working with matters a great deal, too.
Instead of looking for any particular aptitude, what I’m looking for when I read charts of the very young are these sorts of things: What kind of factors during early life can influence if he or she believes his or her creative expression is welcome? What kind of influences can contribute to how he or she feels about school, or the desire for and relationship to achievement (a factor in school success that is in actuality separate from and more important than smarts)? And then broadly, how does this soul feel about itself and life in general?
Using a ’school aptitude’ example in my case, my parents may have learned that I would have interests that range all over the place, and that school might not hold my attention for long (Sagittarius Mercury conjunct Sagittarius Neptune and Moon, in the 2nd and 3rd). They also might have found out that I’d tolerate it even if unhappily, thinking that I needed to do well in it to succeed, and that success would be important to me (South Node in the 10th house). And that I may eventually figure out and express in disruptive ways that I had issues with authority (Uranus in the 1st, conjunct the Ascendant), because I may be pretty sure I’m the only authority around (Rx Saturn in Gemini/9th and Jupiter in Capricorn/3rd).
This is only half in jest - I think my parents could have been well-served to know this handful of things about the energy I carried with me into this life. And with each of them - how great it would have been if any of their parents knew a handful of things about them!
One of the warm and fuzzy visions I harbor of a future world is one in which people recognize themselves and others as unique, and can approach themselves and each other with acceptance of that fact (my Pluto in Libra/12th at work, people). The more readings parents have for newborns, the more that kind of message gets sent in a practical, useful form.
Want to give the most meaningful gift you can to a newly-expanded family? Give them an evolutionary astrology reading and help spread the message of choice and growth that our societies so desperately need.
[steps off of soapbox]
By Tom Jacobs
Transit Lab: The Sun Hits Leo
From just when the Sun entered Leo, but delayed in posting due to technical difficulties:
I thought about posting re the Sun entering Leo but beginning every sentence with “I” and making it all about me. I wasn’t sure, though, if my subtlety would come across.
I swear to you that I could feel this ingress a few moments ago. I found my head feeing a little lighter, in fact.
I felt a bit of release, happy to have a shift after a month of the shining light of the transiting Sun making more evident certain things about my emotional reality. I know that this is important and that it’s my choice and mine alone, but I acknowledge a part of myself that would rather not have 30 days every year that bring a gargantuan flashlight to my own South Node issues. I’m really saying that I have to admit that I’m human, even if the coming alien invaders are tuning in and might think twice about installing me in that great translator job I mentioned a few posts back.
I spent the evening working on a written reading for a baby, but really for the parents. I love doing this kind of reading, as the whole reason I do this work centers on the chance to help people to better understand each other, and what better application is there than new parents wanting to know more about the tiny person they just welcomed into the world? I was surprised to find myself adding to the end of it, It has been an honor to offer this interpretation for your increased understanding of your young daughter. With congratulations and best wishes, [my name].
July 24, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Meaning, Soul Connection & Magickal Living
I seem to write a lot about meaning - the search/hunger for it, means to create it, etc. - and I suppose I’m telling you about me more than anything when I do this. And yet I see in people I meet, clients who come to me for astrological counseling, and in all the stories of people living lives that take them far from themselves only to find out it might have just been the worst thing they could have done. These are the stories you find in any popular media outlet about people doing the things that terrify us, the things that we’re terrified that we also could do.*
In my universe, “meaning” is a mode of being that reflects having identified and aligned with a sense of purpose. From the standpoint of the human need for meaning, it doesn’t matter what that purpose is (unless you’re concerning yourself with politics - national, social, religious or otherwise). If you have a sense of what life is for, there’s a certain sense of fulfillment, even as with that vision you can see that there’s much work to be done to manifest that sense of purpose in real-world terms. In my work, I find a direct correlation of a true sense of meaning (in contrast with some kind of bone to pick with the world, the universe or God that can in a hasty glance be mistaken for meaning) with a person’s connection to soul.
One of my favorite movies is “Contact,” based on the novel by Carl Sagan. The two main characters are a scientist and a spiritual teacher, each with an unshakeable conviction there’s a greater context into which humanity fits. Predictably, the scientist believes the context is among the many life forms in other parts of the galaxy that must, based on the odds, exist. Also predictably, the spiritual teacher sees that context in terms of the existence of God. Some of it you might see coming from a mile away - both are fully devoted to their respective perspectives. There’s a bit of dialogue at one point between these two that spoonfeeds yet makes wonderfully & abundantly clear to us the argument between Gemini and Sagittarius, and better yet, shows the truth that they’re each doing the same thing (seeking & using knowledge in ways they think are the best ways) but in totally opposite ways (the gala’s balcony scene, in case you’re curious).
There’s something comforting to me about that movie, being pretty Gemini-Sagittarius & 3rd-9th house myself. I thought to write about this because I was recently guided to a particular book at a local book store, Soulcraft: Crossing in the Mysteris of Nature and Psyche by Bill Plotkin, New World Library, 2003. According to the back cover, Plotkin is a “depth psychologist, ecotherapist and wilderness guide.” The short story of this book may be impossible for me to relay to you at this point; all I can offer is that when I pick up this book, I’m comforted that there are people working toward helping others find the meaning and reconnection to soul that they seek.
Plotkin works with people at the level of helping them reconnect to their own souls by reconnecting to nature. The meaning of life as it inspires any single person can be found, Plotkin seems to be saying, via a healing journey deep inside ourselves to recapture our sense of soul, and that that sense of soul is intimately connected with nature and the soul of the earth. The souls of humans are intimately connected that of the earth, he seems to say.
In my life, I’m being called to simplify in many ways. I presume this is related to a growing need to reconnect with what I find meaningful. A few weeks ago I sold my car, with the idea of replacing it with a motorcycle, which isn’t falling into place. So, I’m a little slower in my travels, and I get there in ways I haven’t used since moving to LA four years ago. How I travel, where and why are being called into question because, I see, former methods and directions no longer work for or serve me.
I’m also being called to sit for a 10-day Vipassana meditation retreat, ten days of sitting in silence in order to, I seem to be gathering, witness the patterns of the mind and get behind them. This seems a natural extension of the deconditioning work I’ve been engaged in, but on an intense level. I wondered if with Jupiter stationing soon on my Sagittarius Mercury if this was the best idea for me, and I’m pretty sure it is. This transit isn’t only about outward expression, but also about the workings of the conscious mind. And as Jupiter calls for risk in order to expand, I can report that the idea of sitting for ten days in silent meditation, without any of the numerous things in my arsenal I can use to distract myself, is very challenging. But I think I need to risk this in order to reconnect to myself, or perhaps connect to myself for the first time.
If you’ve been reading these posts, you know that my astrological counseling work has taken a turn from intellectual and emotional counseling to become centered in helping people to release their conditioning and connect with their true selves, what we can call “center.” All problems that people come to me with, things they desire to change about their lives, are rooted in beliefs informed by conditioning. What makes my contribution to the conversation on conditioning unique is the multi-life view I take on it: Your early environment in this life echoes the conditioning you took on in other lives, and from a bird’s eye view with some honest, deep work, you can heal the present and the past at the same time, and astrology is a great tool to see those patterns and beliefs and get behind them. And you can’t really heal one without the other which, if you really want to know, requires approaching your self and life and karmic journeys as an organic now, an always-blooming present.
On the personal level, all this leads to my thoughts about my own upcoming Pluto square. A friend pointed out that it can be useful to use wider orbs than I’m wont to for these long, slow transits, which would put me in my Pluto square at present (it’s 6 degrees currently from being exact). I certainly see some experiences over the last year or so as fitting with the challenge of (transiting) Pluto in Sagittarius in the 3rd squaring (natal) Pluto in Libra in the 12th. I’m working with the understanding (that I announce at every opportunity, I’m sure you’re gathering) that if we don’t work consciously with energies, or at least remain open to learning, change and growth, we can feel used by them. Months ago I had some paranoia about negative manifestations of my Pluto square, but am seeing what I can do to charge ahead with consciousness. And this is inspiring and energizing my considerable ranting about the possiblities of living proactively that you’re reading about in this “blog” place.
So, whether I’m in my Pluto square or not might be up for debate. But I’m bound and determined that when it does come around if it’s not here already, I’m not going to settle into old patterns of not allowing my natal Pluto stuff into awareness so that I end up feeling used by the energy. If you keep reading my posts here, I think you’ll get a load of reports of what I’m calling “magickal living,” an approach that basically steps into conscious awareness of life from the astrological point of view. The goal is not to find out about the self from what astrology can tell me (an unimaginitive, empty, numbed-out consumerist standpoint), but working with who I am and am becoming and choosing to allow the challenges for change I’m presented with, based in what I learn about astrology as a language of life (an imaginitive, inspired and creative tack based in the reality of my humanity as a dynamic enterprise).
*The best way to look at the news, by the way, if you venture to admit its poisonous paranoia into your consciousness, is not as a single meaningful statement about what the world is like, but as a series of discrete statements about how some of us choose to create our worlds organized into an attempt to tell you what the world is like so that you will be terrified and buy more ketchup, cars, mascara and other goods to try to cover up your fear that your life is meaningless and that you’ll never find any meaning.
By Tom Jacobs
How, With Whom & Why: Notes on Venus Retrograde
The time (July 27th - September 8th) is for revisiting how, with whom and why we value and relate. The terrain of Venus is of course money and relationships, but behind those is our value systems, our sense of self-confidence and how we relate one thing to another.
During this Rx, you’re being called to call into question how, with whom and why you value and relate. At your best, you’ll see that the situations and realizations that arise are opportunities to understand more about your Venus function. This time is for re-evaluation and re-view, and while things don’t have to change, we tend to grab opportunities to act on our money and relationship issues, and making changes as you become aware of things can be a good thing. After all, you’ll be suddenly armed with new layers of understanding of how you work your confidence, money and relationships.
At your worst…well, I invite you to see how things change during the period as telling you stuff about yourself and how you live that you can use. Use how? To let go of what doesn’t work and set the stage to usher in new things on those fronts that do.
I’m staying open to what I can learn about those fronts in my life, with some admittedly shifty eyes and half a grin. With Venus as my chart ruler and in Libra just above the Ascendant, this planet carries a unique focus in my life. I tend to watch its transits with shifty eyes and half a grin because the lessons can be entertaining to me in their obviousness and my concomitant obliviousness to their obviousness. Many opportunities to point and laugh at myself and how serious I take Venusian stuff with these transits.
I’ve been offered a partial-trade-for-rent living situation in another part of the city that will help me achieve some financial goals in the short term, so there’s that. I’ve also made some new friends recently who present me opportunities to have a new view on myself re how I am in relationships, how I navigate them. The Rx isn’t about new relationships as much as revisiting old patterns or old relationships, but new ones can point out to you stuff about old patterns. I’m taking their cues at Venus stations retrograde (when it appears to slow down before the actual Rx period) to shift into that layer of awareness.
I wondered if a recently-ended relationship could have further (and I’ve felt needed) resolution, but I learned today that that won’t happen soon. I’m totally okay with this as, even as it’s a specific I expected and hoped for, I’ll still get the opportunity to learn and clear out some old patterns…I just might not know how that’ll happen…
AND, perhaps the most amazingly significant thing I’ve done for myself re Venus in a long time: Recently I bought a tennis racket and a can of balls, after not touching a tennis racket forI think 19 years. I used to spend hours almost dailyy hitting against a backboard in the summers. I think from ages 9 or 10 to 14. I used the backboard much more than I played with people, though I did that, too. It helped me get out aggression and to focus, so that I could think clearly. Also, with all this Libra, I LOVE the opportunities for grace in movement while playing tennis. I won’t dance for any reason, but I’ll play tennis against a backboard for hours almost every day. There is such subtlety possible in handling a racket and returning the ball, and it’s a conversation between you and…and a green wooden board. All my Libra loves that possibility for conversation. And when my grip and consistency are a little more re-settled, I’ll look for actual people to play with.
The last while that I played as a teenager I played with a close friend from the neighborhood. He got the whole athlete thing on a level I never dreamed I would.* I assume I held my own in tennis, at least, since I seem to remember that I was pretty okay with it. But anyway this friend e-mailed me out of the blue during the last Venus Rx, December of 2005?, after not having contact with each other since high school. I just dug up his e-mail address and am about to e-mail him - how almost Venus Rx of me to return the favor 18 months later.
So anyway, I’ve been hitting against the backboard and feeling awesome about it. I think that experience deserves an entire other post, as I’m learning a ton about how I use my Libra-1st house energy - Mars & Uranus conjunct there…yeah, more on that later.
*We were also on the same little league team, which his dad coached. How I got on the team: The day that they were having tryouts at their house one summer, I was there, hanging around there and playing with Jason because that’s what we did. His dad asked me if I wanted to be on the team, and I asked what I would have to do. He said some vague-to-me sounding stuff about concerning myself and interacting with a baseball (literally, I found out later), running sometimes, catching sometimes, and I casually agreed because I couldn’t think of a reason not to. For four years I played left field, which is where my attention tended to be as a kid anyway - Bruce knew how to place kids, I know now.
http://www.tdjacobs.com
July 23, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Down With Robots: Self-understanding, Creation & Growth With Astrology
In my experience, people learning astrology have a suspicion somewhere below their skin that tells them that it’s useful for self-transformation. What they find when beginning their study, though, might not seem to support that suspicion.
What I’d really like to say is that people are not as stupid as most of the teaching of astrology seems to assume they are.
While astrology employs many lists of data, those data are not the heart of astrology. Those coming to astrology bring their hearts usually before their heads (if you wanted simply to be seen as smart because you can master teachings, astrology with its entrenched & widespread misunderstanding by the culture won’t likely be your first choice), and such a study is a great way to work with that heart and understand what it means to have and create meaning in our lives, a fundamental issue for any human seeking self-knowledge.
Again: The heart of astrology is not sets of data. Every astrologer needs to have learned the lists of data, but not at the expense of creative thinking and the urge to connect with soul that drives so many of its students to find it.
People are not ever truly convinced at the soul level that they’re the robots that traditional astrological teaching and analysis with its emphasis on clear-cut delineations of planets in signs and houses, etc., indicates, and we should stop trying to believe that we are.
I know in my bones that no one truly wants to believe that he or she is a robot (and that a transiting square from Saturn to a planet in the 1st or any other nonsense interpretation will result in the development of arthritis), but the alternatives can be hard to identify and approach.
Over the last few days, a vision of my work, what I’ve been developing for over three years, has begun taking shape. I should say a clearer assignation of words to the feeling of inspiration I have when doing astrology either as a counselor for deep transformation or initiating students to the evolutionary, growth- and choice-oriented approach I practice.
The bottom line of that vision is my conviction that not only is no human a robot, but that anyone can learn to use astrology to understand and change his or her life. If you accept astrology as something that tells you what and who you are, you embrace a view that’s based in an absolute lack of imagination. If you buy into it, you will be confronted with the option of numbing yourself by attempting to fit yourself into little boxes created by organizing lists of data that were never meant to take into account your complexity - your humanity.
Personally, I love how truly complex you are. No matter how you see yourself, I can’t see you as a robot…because you’re not. You’re just not. You’re not the product of lists of data, and no matter how hard you try, you can’t make it true. No one can.
My vision of this work centers on the fact that anyone wishing to understand his- or herself better can learn a rudimentary approach to astrology that will serve as a profound tool for discovery and understanding of self. Beginning to learn the language of astrology by getting a grounding in the grammar of it.
No matter who you are, if you’re willing to look at your life in order to make it more reflective of your divine complexity, your magnificent conflictedness because you’re spirit temporarily tied to matter here on this wet, beautiful orb, you can learn to use astrology to transform your life.
I spoke with an old friend today on the telephone, someone who always inspires me to bring forth my vision…whichever one I’m harboring at any time we speak. She has this precious effect on me for which I’m perennially grateful. I told her about some of the stuff I’m working on these days, and she reminded me that people are hungry for meaning. And the only way to have meaning, I chimed in as I remembered my work with Albert Camus’ version of existentialism for my college thesis, is to create it.
You have the choice each day to create something, to be creative. Whether its art, music or literature or social change, an easing of suffering or a more ordered or beautiful world, you have this choice each and every day. The purpose and the meaning you have in your life you must create. Camus makes the statement that the only serious philosophical problem is that of suicide: So many of us can’t find a meaning to this whole life thing, and all we have to do is understand that up to us to have meaning at all.
(One reason I like this format is that when I stray from a point or dive into what seems like a tangent, you’re saying to yourselves, “Well it IS only a blog.” And you probably already have dreadfully short attention spans, polished blue hot dogs in cellophane shoes.)
My lord, finally a closing: No, no closing.
(It’s just a blog, after all.)
http://www.tdjacobs.com
July 22, 2007 By Tom Jacobs