Presence

By Tom Jacobs

Trying to hide from suffering is extremely painful and will rob you of your life.
Cheri Huber, Making A Change For Good: A Guide to Compassionate Self-Discipline, Shambala Publications, Inc., p. 25

As it is today, at the start of a consultation I ask my client what it is he or she would like to accomplish, and the session is spent getting deep into the issues impacting what they tell me. My input is informed by astrology, and is geared to show the client ways to open to accept and love herself more, given the influences and tendencies in her natal chart and what I can learn about her conditioning. Spirit help that shows up to the session to help guide things comes into play here, and their only perspective is that of offering loving guidance.

My work is focused on helping clients turn around the situations in their lives that concern, hurt and vex them, and the key to doing this in every situation is an ongoing increase in compassionate awareness. What’s happened has happened, but can we learn to be present with what’s happening now? Healing depends on presence, and if presence is lacking, what goes on is cycling through memories and thoughts in order to maintain their hold on us. For many of us, what we get from maintaining stricture and strangulation from identifying with those thoughts, memories, hopes and fears is no longer worth it.

We are present when we identify with what’s happening right now; when we don’t identify with memories of events of the past or wishes and fears for the future. When we’re present, it doesn’t mean that there’s no pain, but we can see how not to identify with it. We’re aware of what is, and when we’re there, it turns out that there’s nothing wrong. And this isn’t about ignoring problems or denying that things need doing.

Healing in this work hinges on the answers to a few questions:

• is the client committed to heal herself, even if she has to change?
• is she open to see herself and her choices in a clear light from a place of presense?
• will she choose compassion for herself as she sees herself in a new light?

Note the absence of the word “I”; healing in this work is done by the client. It’s reflected in how open he is when information comes through for him, and how he chooses to live differently based on the work we do together. My role is that of a guide who points out doors and paths unseen, or perhaps overlooked.

Clients coming to me are, in essence, trying to get their lives back. Allowing voices of the past and fears of the future to rob them of their lives is no longer acceptable. Reclaiming yourself by getting present is the most empowered and empowering thing you can do. Facing the suffering we bring ourselves via the voices of the past and fears of the future is difficult, often the most difficult thing we’ve ever done, but the payoff is having your life back, and who doesn’t want that?

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June 19, 2007 By Tom Jacobs