Mercury Retrograde in Cancer: Who Needs What?
By Tom Jacobs
As a Cancer South Node person, I generally think I have a handle on that energy and how it works in my life. But I’m surprised at how much insight this retrograde period has afforded me. I just talked with my mother on the telephone, and everything we talked about was directly relevant to this period: clearing out old and unneeded stuff from our homes, our varying levels of attachment to those stuffs, what each of us has learned over time (her over years and me over the last few months) about our eating habits and how they’re (in)formed by our emotional worlds and conditioning.
The most striking inner dialogue of the many popping up in me during the talk was that surrounding the dishes with silver crescents on the lips and matching crystal that have my name on them. These were gifts to my parents at their wedding, and I remember eating off them for special occasions often while growing up. They are beautiful, the most beautiful I’ve ever seen. I love these dishes, and I mean love (Venus in Libra on the Libra Ascendant, anyone?), but there is no way on earth I’d ever use them. None. Zero. I’m a minimalist at home (Capricorn on the IC), never setting a table in any formal way and don’t even keep decorative things around. (Or a table, for that matter.) As I glance around my livingroom right now, I see a chair, a bookcase, a desk (but no chair, I notice), a printer and a pair of shoes…and there’s a cat on the floor over by the door. Dish-wise, I’m the kind of guy to use the same plate and fork at each meal, interrupting their use only for washing.
What I remember yet again is that staying connected to things cannot possibly offer a connection to family and heritage, one energy behind the archetype of Cancer - arguably what any of us wants when we’re in Cancerian modes. For some reason we hold onto the things in lieu of the relationships, but it doesn’t work. While I talked with her I realized that a few weeks ago I sold a bass trombone I’d been playing since I was 15. A very beautiful collector’s edition that I, as a musician, grew up with and into. It no longer made sense to define myself as a musician, which I realized I’d been doing, so it went to some guy somewhere in Texas who said he’d give it a good home. I was blown away that I’d actually given up that thing, given how it represented an idea of me for so long.
So, connection to family & heritage: Last year I looked at the charts of around 12 family members, going back a few generations. The single theme in common was a ton of Uranus/Aquarius/11th house work, whether with Suns in Aquarius, Suns conjunct Uranus, Aquarian Moons, one or the other node in Aquarius or the 11th, or Uranus square the nodes. I read in this that we’ve been looking for generations at what it means to be free.
Now, with my Cancer South Node, I’m prone to sentimentalism, attachments to things like pretty dishes from ancestors and shiny musical instruments from my youth. The ruler Moon, however, is in Sagittarius/3rd, opposing retrograde Saturn in Gemini/9th. That Moon wants freedom, but feels locked in place by Saturn. I experience this is as a tension between my personal needs and the tradition I come from, and can at times get caught up in that inner dialogue. Also, though, my Uranus is in the 1st house and square the nodes, and I see in it an individuation imperative. Even as the urge to sentimentalism is strong, the urge to break out always turns out to be stronger.
Imagine that every chart in your family you can get your hands on going back three generations screams a need to find individuation and freedom, and you can feel the need to break free in your own body, and you’re worrying that getting rid of some 40-yr old dishes no one ever uses or even looks at might be a bad idea.
Just imagine that.
I’m aware that there’s a persistent question in me with this Cancerian South Node and Uranus in the 1st squaring it: Am I where I come from, or am I something totally different? Balancing the needs of having a history and tradition to come from, the need to feel rooted in something, and the need to be free of all such things. The question becomes, “How can I honor where I came from as I have to completely break free from it (and, probably, spray paint viva la revolucion on its walls)?”
June 28, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Mercury Retrograde in Cancer: Let’s Eat
By Tom Jacobs
What do you eat, and why?
How do you feel about what you eat?
Is eating for you about sustenance, or is it about something else?
When you eat, do you know how your body reacts to what you’re eating and how you’re eating it?
What does your body feel like as you eat? What are the physical sensations? What’s happening in your stomach, your gut, your mouth?
How much time do you spend eating? Do you eat quickly or slowly?
Do you eat at certain times of the day, or when you start to notice hunger, or when it’s an emergency?
Do you eat big meals? Small ones? Are you a constant snacker? A perennial grazer?
What were you taught about food when you were young?
Do you still believe those things?
What would it be like to be aware of everything that you put in your mouth, and feel good about it?
Do you judge yourself for your food choices?
If you feel accused, understand that there’s a part of you making your food choices that feels bad for what it chooses. The current Mercury retrograde is a fantastic time to get in touch with any and all issues we have with food and how they tie in to our emotional worlds. Any part of you that wants you to feel bad is not really you - underline that. Most of us run our lives via subpersonalities formed in childhood as survival strategies. As Zen and meditation teacher Cheri Huber points out, they didn’t work then and they don’t work now.
If you tie food to your emotional reality (as most of us do) and wish to change it, the first step is to be aware. I ask the questions above to encourage you to choose more awareness in your relationship with food. The opportunity of the moment is to see, learn and understand more. Our mental energy (Mercury) retrograding through the sign of feelings and food (Cancer) can open a doorway to seeing who’s running the food area of your life. In a lot of people it’s a younger version of us that’s afraid of not having enough love, perhaps even an infant version of ourselves. See if you can take in whatever new information comes to you without judgment, just to see what’s happening. Knowing what’s really going on and why is the first step if you wish to change your relationship with food.
For most of us, our relationship with food is a mirror of our relationship with our emotions. Looking at the issues we have with food will tell us volumes about the issues we have with our emotions, whether our actual emotions or our capacity to feel and deal with them. Read the questions again:
What do you feel, and why?
How do you feel about what you feel?
When you spend time with your feelings, do you know how your body reacts to what you’re feeling?
What does your body feel like as you feel? What are the physical sensations? What’s happening in your stomach, your gut, your mouth?
How much time do you spend with your feelings? Do you spend a lot or a little of time with them? Do you recognize their existence in an abstract way, or do you allow yourself to really be with them?
Are you open to emotions all the time, or only when you start to notice something big is brewing, or when it’s an emergency and can’t be held back any longer?
What were you taught about emotions when you were young?
Do you still believe those things?
What would it be like to be aware of all of your emotions, and feel good about them?
Do you judge yourself for your feelings?
Suggested reading: Anything by Cheri Huber.
June 27, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Mercury Retrograde in Cancer: Your Inner Demons May Actually Be Your Inner Children
By Tom Jacobs
We’ve had more than a week to get into the personal effects of the current Mercury retrograde period. It’s traversing through Cancer, the sign of emotions, needs, nurturing, the child, as well as ties to family, heritage, tradition and nation. Any retrograde period turns inward the function associated with the planet in question. As Mercury at root represents perception, thought and communication, we’re talking about an inward review of emotional issues and thought patterning based on them.
Everyone regardless of natal planetary placement has the opportunity to review lingering issues related to these areas of our lives. In most cases, we’re learning things we didn’t know about ourselves and how we let our past and emotions shape us: why we persist in certain patterns, where in our lives unseen patterns based on outdated emotional realities run the show, how sentimental reactions define us in (probably) unexpected ways. The opportunity is to see in new light or the first time how these things are working, and to let them go if they don’t serve us.
My experience during this retrograde has centered on giving voice to a younger part of me that felt unable, unsupported, and unsafe to express intense emotions (Scorpio Sun, Pluto in the 12th, Uranus-Mars in the 1st here). A few weeks ago I did a miniregression on myself, taking the 34 year old Tom back to have a chat with a 7 year old Tom, the point being to reconnect to this subconscious part of me that thinks that everything’s wrong all the time (because, well, it isn’t, and I think I’d prefer to live in the here and now). I made contact, even hugged the little guy and told him that things aren’t the same, agreed to take care of him. But I didn’t listen to anything he had to say those few times I made contact, and a couple of weeks later my jaw began giving me trouble. Via a reading with an intuitive friend, I was given imagery of my back turned on that 7 year old, and his jaw moving constantly, apparently trying to tell me something. So, this retrograde period for me is about learning to listen to this part of me that’s so needing of attention.
Natally I have Jupiter at 6 degrees of Capricorn in the 3rd house. As I began writing this post, thinking about Mercury retrograding into opposition with it from my 9th house, I realized that I’ve never been challenged with regard to all the big ideas I have (and there have been many…). So, this retrograde period could be a good time for me to challenge myself (and if I don’t, it WILL come from an external source – it’s going to happen one way or the other because that’s the energy on tap). In the next few days the opposition will be exact, and I know that my critical eyes will be extra sharp and I’ll be extra careful in proofreading and editing both an article I’ve written for publication and my query letter for it. Last night I began to have questions about my idea of the article’s structure, or if how I think the best way to communicate the story is truly the best way, and how much information is enough (my Jupiter in the 3rd likes to give a lot of info). With transiting Jupiter conjunct my natal Moon-Mercury conjunction in Sagittarius in the 3rd house, I’m keeping in check the urge to finish the letter and article as soon as possible and send them off.
If you’re having a rough time during this retrograde period, patience is called for, as is a willingless to feel what’s happening instead of simply emotionally reacting to it. Listen to the various emotional parts of yourself and what they have to say. When things break down and communication is sketchy, at best, take the cue to listen to yourself on a deeper level. I guarantee you that there are parts of yourselves tripping over themselves to be heard during this particular Mercury retrograde period. Give them some air, and you’ll learn some critical things about yourself and how your overall reality is in fact shaped by your emotional reality.
June 26, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
I Read Somewhere That…
By Tom Jacobs
I’ve all but desisted participation in online astrology forums, something I used to do quite a bit. This is for various reasons, but a huge one is that reading the title as many times as I did told me that it was time to go where my perspective could make a noticeable difference.
I practice and teach an alive sort of astrology, one that understands that a natal chart is a map of a person’s life. That (each and every) person is alive and full of desires and always has free will, and treating the map of her life as containing a bunch of facts that you can find listed in the old-time predictive regurgitate practically filling the pages of the internet is misguided, erroneous and silly.
Now, maybe I’m just having a bad day. But wait – that’s not it, I’ve had a great day so far. I went to the local farmer’s market, took a walk, played with my cat…though I did notice practically to the second when Mars entered Taurus a few minutes ago…
But back to my point: Do you believe everything you read? Do you believe that because you read something on a website that it’s true? Do you know that someone who has no idea about the heart of astrology can put up a site and fill it with pop garbage distilled from other pop garbage sites, garbage that reinforces the stereotypes too many astrology students already believe? Do you think that if you read the same thing on four different web sites that it must be true?
An astrologer named Jeff Green teaches that 70% of the population anywhere at any given time is in a consensus state. These are the folks who do and believe what they’re told, and don’t want the status quo to change. That low, huh?
No, wait a minute –it’s true: I’m having a bad day. (DUDE!: MARS just went into TAURUS.) But that doesn’t change the fact that the real test of any piece of information about astrology is how someone lives it, how it shows up in someone’s life.
The next time a student of mine begins a question with, “I read somewhere that,” I’m going to congratulate him for finding someone else to do his thinking. Read this last sentence in all-caps: If you want to learn astrology, get away from your computer and go work with actual people.
Note: Tom is a caring, compassionate astrologer and teacher, regardless of his tone here. He’s just having a bad day – Mars entered Taurus today, you know.
June 24, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Predictability
By Tom Jacobs
Will I meet that special someone? Will I get the promotion I’ve been promised? Will my [family member] get off my back/stop arguing with me/give me a break?
What can astrology answer? Astrology deals in energy, and when astrology is spoken in its most useful form, it’s a language of themes and choice. When Pluto, for example, comes around by transit, doom isn’t guaranteed, contrary to popular belief. What is indicated is irrevocable change. It usually looks like a lot of hurt, and behind that is the opportunity to look at something deep in you in a new way, or perhaps for the first time. The energy of Pluto isn’t by definition about hardship and loss, but things can get hard and our reactions to the prompt to look at things we don’t want to see can manifest situations that seem to say so.
What we choose is central to everything. How we experience life is based in the choices we make, both conscious, subconscious and unconscious. Regardless of why we do what we do, our reactions to what happens around and in us determine much. With a Pluto transit, for example, something major must change. I liken it to deep soil being tilled, overturned and, ultimately, being left on top. The process can be wrenching. But the opportunities to give hitherto-hidden parts of ourselves air, light and water are priceless – new growth cannot occur if the soil is never tilled. Pluto transits can be the most intense of any transits, but there is always an opportunity to leave something that doesn’t work behind and learn to plant new seeds.
I’ve had a couple of readings by a Jyotishi, a practicer of the ancient Indian astrology called Jyotish, and I’ve studied the system. I respect the predictions made by those working with that system if they honor a truth built into the system, just as ancient: We can choose to live in harmony with the universe by respecting the various planetary energies and how we’re affected by them. For every difficulty enumerated, there is a remedy to prescribe. These range from the wearing of gems to the chanting of mantras, offerings of foods of certain kinds, and wearing of certain colors.
Western astrologers offering prediction of specific events and experiences, on the other hand, seem to me sometimes suffering from a case of trying to give the people what they expect. Woven into contemporary cultural understanding of astrology is a good deal of detritus left over from a long time ago, when specifics of astrology were taken for generalties: Jupiter in the 1st house makes you tall or fat, Mercury in the 8th house makes a person untrustworthy, a liar or obsessed with sex and death, etc. Meaning that some people with Jupiter in the 1st were tall and/or fat, some people with that Mercury placement were liars, and the idea that the planets represent energy and not specific realities and eventualities was forgotten.
So, then, energies are happening. That’s what we’re talking about when we speak astrology. But what about something you might want to know: Will you meet that special someone this year? The way to look at this astrologically is to look at the relationship energies in your natal chart and the transits and progressions for the present and the coming year. In evolutionary astrology, we look at astrological influences without judging them as good or bad, as the system is rooted in the understanding that the very reason we’re incarnated on earth is to progress through levels of experience and understanding, to learn. A surge in relationship energy could be present or on the way, but whether or not you meet a special someone rests on the choices you make, based on the emphasis on relationship energy.
The experiences we have as lessons along our journeys don’t fit particular scripts. If a lesson is to learn for example the value of security, what the person uses to feel secure will be threatened or, at worst, erased, but what constitutes security will vary from person to person. For some, it’s stable employment, for others a solid home, or perhaps family life. For still others, it can be reputation or esteem. A challenge to the sense of security can take any number of forms, depending on the person and his or her unique individual journey.
I offer that what we can prediect using the tools of Tropical astrology is that energy is coming down the pike, on its way, around the bend; that things fitting with certain symbolism happen at different times in our lives, and that we can chart the landscape of them by looking to the stars. What the events fitting the symbolism look like we can never predict, and how we respond to them we also can never predict, as people possess and use this amazing thing we call free will – human choices are what advance humans along their human journeys.
June 22, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Presence
By Tom Jacobs
Trying to hide from suffering is extremely painful and will rob you of your life.
Cheri Huber, Making A Change For Good: A Guide to Compassionate Self-Discipline, Shambala Publications, Inc., p. 25
As it is today, at the start of a consultation I ask my client what it is he or she would like to accomplish, and the session is spent getting deep into the issues impacting what they tell me. My input is informed by astrology, and is geared to show the client ways to open to accept and love herself more, given the influences and tendencies in her natal chart and what I can learn about her conditioning. Spirit help that shows up to the session to help guide things comes into play here, and their only perspective is that of offering loving guidance.
My work is focused on helping clients turn around the situations in their lives that concern, hurt and vex them, and the key to doing this in every situation is an ongoing increase in compassionate awareness. What’s happened has happened, but can we learn to be present with what’s happening now? Healing depends on presence, and if presence is lacking, what goes on is cycling through memories and thoughts in order to maintain their hold on us. For many of us, what we get from maintaining stricture and strangulation from identifying with those thoughts, memories, hopes and fears is no longer worth it.
We are present when we identify with what’s happening right now; when we don’t identify with memories of events of the past or wishes and fears for the future. When we’re present, it doesn’t mean that there’s no pain, but we can see how not to identify with it. We’re aware of what is, and when we’re there, it turns out that there’s nothing wrong. And this isn’t about ignoring problems or denying that things need doing.
Healing in this work hinges on the answers to a few questions:
- is the client committed to heal herself, even if she has to change?
- is she open to see herself and her choices in a clear light from a place of presense?
- will she choose compassion for herself as she sees herself in a new light?
Note the absence of the word “I”; healing in this work is done by the client. It’s reflected in how open he is when information comes through for him, and how he chooses to live differently based on the work we do together. My role is that of a guide who points out doors and paths unseen, or perhaps overlooked.
Clients coming to me are, in essence, trying to get their lives back. Allowing voices of the past and fears of the future to rob them of their lives is no longer acceptable. Reclaiming yourself by getting present is the most empowered and empowering thing you can do. Facing the suffering we bring ourselves via the voices of the past and fears of the future is difficult, often the most difficult thing we’ve ever done, but the payoff is having your life back, and who doesn’t want that?
June 19, 2007 By Tom Jacobs
Squares to the Nodes of the Moon
By Tom Jacobs
Squares to the nodes are planets and angles that are 90 degrees or so in the chart from the nodes of the Moon. In the evolutionary astrology view, these bodies and points represent unresolved issues from past lives, which manifest in this life in the form of numerous opportunities for alternate choices so we can learn to resolve those issues. We draw to ourselves people and situations fitting the symbolism of the body or angle by house and sign that’s squaring the nodes, and a colleague of mine recently noted that she sees people often making their work out of these symbols, as there’s a focus on revisiting the energies in question and those people can often focus so much that they make their career from it.
A good word for what’s squaring the nodes is vexation. There’s something about the symbols we just don’t get. It can be perplexing and frustrating to run through the same kinds of experiences, or encounter the same sorts of person vexing us and not know how to behave differently.
But that’s just it: We need to learn from experience something new about that energy. The good thing, or the bad thing, depending on how much of an optimist you are and how much energy you have, is that you’ll draw the experiences and people offering the opportunity for seeing what you need to see until you get it. If you have squares to the nodes, think about all the times you’ve run up against people and experiences fitting the symbolism of your squares (Mars is assertiveness & aggression, Jupiter is optimism, risk and belief, etc.), and how often you decided to make a different choice. And if you made a different choice than you’d always made before, did something major shift?
In the karmic past (and re-created in our present lives in order to give ourselves another chance to figure it out), a square to the nodes is something that we had experienced on some level, but not in a way that got us where we wanted to go, or not in a way that, sometimes, allowed for our survival. The square is the aspect of friction, and between the two bodies in question, something’s got to give. Typically, when we’re caught off guard by something coming at us from the side, it’s us that gives.
People with squares to the nodes might be coming from a past in which they avoided life arenas and experience based on the symbolism. Often this comes with a life that’s for any number of reasons overly focused on certain parts of life, and avoiding other facets. As evolutionary astrology views existence as a series of growth opportunities, the prevalence of the frustrating opportunities is seen as healthy, important and necessary.
Consciousness is the key to moving forward with these placements; avoiding knee-jerk reactions to what vexes us is key. The moment of vexation, of frustration and resulting anger due to a feeling of powerlessness, is precisely the moment when those with these configurations need to keep an open mind and be aware of their various options.
June 18, 2007 By Tom Jacobs